Many of you have
been so wonderful to text me this week to check up on us... Thank
you! And now we can finally report that we have a game plan! After
going to the doctor this week, we have successfully completed IVF
“training”, signed all the paperwork, Will is a pro at giving
shots to a fake stomach, and we have an EXTREMELY detailed calendar
telling us what we medications and shots we take each day until
“harvest day.
The irony of IVF is
that you start the process by taking birth control. I’ll do this
for 3.5 weeks to begin stimulating follicle growth. (Apparently
follicles make eggs. Who knew.) Then, the shots start on Dec. 30th,
just in time for New Year’s. The 1st round will just be
one shot, twice a day, for 10 days. Then I’ll go in for a
“suppression check.” They’ll check to make sure both ovaries
are producing follicles at the same rate. (This will maximize that
both sides are creating eggs, rather than the normal process when
only one side does. This is so they can “harvest” as many eggs as
possible from both sides.) If all is well, we start the harder shots
(4 a day) on Jan 11th, for 10 days, then they do the
harvest.
A "harvest"
is when they go in and open up my ovaries and take all the eggs out
that they can. Women “usually” (aka: when they aren’t partaking
in a fertility science project) produce one "mature" egg at
a time, and then there are some extra eggs that are hanging out
preparing to be "chosen" the next month. In my case,
because of the pills and the hormone shots, both sides should have
very active follicles and be producing WAY more eggs than usual.
(Remember when they said women were born with the number of eggs they
have in their lifetime? That's only partly true. We're born with the
number of follicles, which create the eggs. I know... we've
been lied to.) "Harvest day" is the hardest part of the
whole process since there's a "recovery"
afterward. However, luck is on our side! January 20th,
“Harvest Day”, is known to the rest of the country as Martin
Luther King Day. So the market will be closed, as well as MD
Anderson’s Development Office. So Will and I will only have to
focus making babies in petri dishes, rather than emails or stock
prices.
After harvest,
there’s a continual game of “how many”:
- How many eggs did
they extract?
- How many eggs
became embryos? (they will make them embryos immediately after
harvesting)
- How many embryos
survived the freezing?
Then they're shipped
to be genetically tested, which is the big operation. This is what
we're the most nervous about. The big question is "how many
embryos are genetically 'normal'?" (Results will take about
2 weeks after harvest.)
You would think the
ideal results would be "100% of the embryos that were
genetically tested were normal!" But we actually don't want
that. We want most to be normal but a few abnormal. Let's say
they were able to genetically test 10 embryos. If all 10 are
genetically "bad", then we don't have any to implant and
our option would be an egg donor. (Or adoption, obviously.)
However, if all 10 are good, that means for whatever reason, I can't
carry. (I have some auto-immune issues, so it's possible my body just
attacks the embryo.) If that's the case, we have to make the decision
on whether to continue with IVF, although the chances of a positive
outcome are very low, or we can move forward with finding a
gestational carrier. (Someone to carry a "baby" that is
genetically 100% ours, but she would just carry. Gestational Carrier
and Surrogacy are different. Thanks for teaching me that E!'s “Giuliana
& Bill”!)
All of these "what
if's" are hard to comprehend, so we've decided to stick to the
questions like "what wine should we drink tonight" instead,
and try to not worry about the “what ifs.”
After we find out if
we can make the final "transfer", I will do about 3 weeks
of shots again to prepare my body. The transfer is a lot easier to
do, and isn't as intense as the harvest. However, we’re not even
asking about specific dates regarding the transfer (will probably
happen sometimes in March), because we just want to get through this
genetic testing first.
My on-earth guardian
angel, Annie Wells, emailed me a few days ago that she was at church
and the sermon was about Advent. She was reminded how Advent is
really just a time that we “prepare ye the way of the Lord.”
While my little science baby will be funniest, smartest, and
most adorable kid on the block, he/she won’t compare to the gift
that came on December 25th so many years ago. (Not to
mention my situations got NOTHING on Mary’s.) And yet the
lessons of anticipation and preparation of a gift are as real as
ever. Prepare ye the way!
Love to all,
Kendall and Will
